Recipe for nausea

Well, it started yesterday. Nausea. I wouldn't call it morning sickness. It's not as bad as when I was pregnant with Malena. Of course, it's only been one day.

I had the bright idea to make chicken sausage gumbo. This is funny, because I did the same thing when I was early pregnant the first time.

First thing you have to do is cut up a whole chicken. The sound of the bones cracking beneath my super sharp Henkels knife was disgusting. I looked down at what I was doing and just felt sick.

Second thing you gotta do is look at the recipe. I happened to be following the one from Vernon Roger's Cajun Cookbook. It took me back to my days in Louisiana when good ole Vernon was the anchorman for WAFB-TV channel 9...until he got busted with Baton Rouge's own version of a Heidi Fleiss while he was wearing a diaper doing God-knows-what. Ugh. The very thought of a grown man in a diaper made the nausea return with a vengeance!

Third thing you do is make a roux. Easy enough. Just keep stirring. Don't let it burn. And, DO NOT, whatever you do, DO NOT TASTE IT. Duh! I forgot it tastes like sin. Urge to puke continues.

Fourth thing you must do (which isn't mentioned in the recipe...I wonder why) is drain the nearly two cups of pure artery-clogging orange grease from the top of the delicious brew. It is a result of boiling the tasty yet FOUL (ha ha get it!) faux-andouille sausage from Portugal and the chicken skin. Score another one for nausea.

I had to stop singing "Jambalaya Crawfish Pie-a Filet Gumbo" just so I could eat my lunch.